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Humor – How to tell if you’re owned by a bird or birds February 22, 2007

Posted by Andrew in : Misc , trackback
Here’s a little humour to brighten your day!
How to tell if you’re owned by a bird-(s)
You can hardly type because your bird is dancing on
the keyboard while chewing on your pen!

You spend more time cleaning your bird cages than your
house!

You hear an “echo” each time you push a microwave
button!

You try to teach your dog to say “Hello!”

Your hungry family asks what’s for dinner and you say
you just whipped up a fresh pot of “Crazy Corn!”

You’re going across town and you realize half-way
there that your bird is still sitting on your
shoulder!

You kiss the birds good-night but not your spouse!

You go on the vacation of a lifetime and can only tell
your friends what cool bird stuff you found!

You don’t care if people see bird poop stains on your
shirt!

Your darling birdie sneezes and you drive 2 hours to
the avian vet!

Every shirt you own has buttons missing!

You say “Hello….Hello….Hello!” to your people
friends.

You pull up in the driveway, and you see that your
bird is looking out the window. You start waving
saying, “Hi Kiwi. Its mommy! I’m home from work now.”

Your friends dog is pregnant, and you ask if the
puppies have hatched yet.

Later you accidentally refer to his dog as a “hen.”

You’re leaving a gathering of friends, and you find
yourself saying, “Bye bye! Gimmee SMOOCHIES!”

At last count you had over 200 bird toys and only 2
birds.

You make sure your pizza isn’t too hot so the birdies
wont burn their feet.

You’re on a first-name basis with the seed moths that
hang around your house.

You refer to the hair loss from your dog as “molting.”

You tell your boyfriend not to touch you in front of
the bird because the bird might get jealous.

You drop your purse in the supermarket and sunflower
seeds fall out.

You fight over who gets custody of the birds when the
romance ends.

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Comments»

1. K_tigress - February 23, 2007

Heh I love it.
Here’s some more……
Your birds use you or your hands and potential nest sites.
Your birds see you as their mates.
Your only boyfriend or girlfriend has feathers and is the only one that serenades you.
You try to learn how to talk like them.

Been there and guilty of those. LOL

2. Beowulf - July 10, 2007

I snuggle to mum, give her kisses all uver her hand (y doesn’t she have wings?), tell her “I love you”, and then fule dad by giving him kisses when he kisses mum. So, ur write K_tigress

Of course, neighter mum nor dad see me when I “sneak” a bite from whatever they’re eating. That is, unless they tell me it’s not saf for me too eat.


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